A Ball Teaches Detachment

Holding on to things and people blocks the flow of life and makes us sick.  We hold on to stuff, to emotions, to thoughts, to our assumptions about how the world works and what is real.  We hold on to our expectations.  Learning to let go is a profound and simple spiritual principle and practice, and it is a key to inner peace and happiness. We generally don’t look for spiritual teachers in bouncing, expanding balls, but then if we don’t look, we don’t find.  Magic is all around us.  It’s everywhere within you.  You just have to know how to look.

What are three fundamental life issues that you are dealing with now in your life?

1 Physical tension

2 Existential fear, job

3 Letting go

Which issue brings up the strongest feelings for you?

Fear of letting go

If those feelings had a color (or colors), what would it be?


Imagine that color filling the space in front of you so that it has depth, height, width, and aliveness.

Now watch that color swirl, congeal, and condense into a shape. Don’t make it take a shape, just watch it and say the first thing that you see or that comes to your mind: An animal? Object? Plant? What?

My little small yellow ball!  My jumping ball! (From a previous interview.)

Now remember how as a child you liked to pretend you were a teacher or a doctor?  It’s easy and fun for you to imagine that you are the shape that took form from your color and answer some questions I ask, saying the first thing that comes to your mind.  If you wait too long to answer, that’s not the character answering – that’s YOU trying to figure out the right thing to say!

Jumping ball, would you please tell me about yourself and what you are doing?

I am jumping and smiling!  I’m in front of Benita!

What do you like most about yourself? What are your strengths?

My jumping!   I am standing before her and she can feel what I feel but I am away from her.  My joy of life expressed in my jumping about!

What do you dislike most about yourself? Do you have weaknesses?  What are they?

I wish I could be closer to her.  It’s a wish for me.

What aspect of Benita do you represent or most closely personify?

Flexibility, her aliveness!

Jumping ball, if you could be anywhere you wanted to be and take any form you desired, would you change?  If so, how?

I would like to be jumping around inside Benita!

Tell us what that’s like…

It’s fun!  I can take her along!  I’m so alive she jumps about in aliveness!

(Continue, answering as the transformed object, if it chose to change.)

(Character), how would you score yourself 0-10, in each of the following six qualities:  confidence, compassion, wisdom, acceptance, inner peace, and witnessing?  Why?

Confidence: 10  I don’t do fear!

Compassion: 10

Wisdom:   5

Acceptance:   8

Inner Peace:   7

Witnessing:   8

Ball, if you scored tens in all six of these qualities, would you be different?  If so, how?

I would expand.  I’d get better and sparkle more.  More relaxed.  More inner peace.  More wisdom!

How would Benita’s life be different if he/she naturally scored like you do in all six of these qualities all the time?

Calm. more peaceful.  I am still alive and joyful, but it’s not as restless as before.  It’s not as superficial.  It is deeply rooted within.  I don’t have the need to jump about like I did before.

If you could live Benita’s life for her, how would you live it differently?

I would allow more free spaces, more time for fun!

If you could live Benita’s waking life for her today, would you handle Benita’s three life issues differently?  If so, how?

Physical tension: I don’t feel that.  If I’m there and I can expand, she won’t have these problems because she won’t feel that kind of tension.  I’ll be warm inside of her.

Could you do that now?

I have done it and she feels far more relaxed and better!

Existential fear, job: I don’t do such worries.  I’m not worried about Benita.  She’s good. She’ll always have work!  I would jump to wherever there is something to eat!  I’d hop to the place where there is something for me.  I’m flexible!

Letting go:  I let go  I don’t hold on to anything in the first place.  What’s there to hold on to in the first place?

I expand and make for warmth inside her so that she relaxes. She can expand so that it’s easier for her to let go and not hold on to things.  This is about not holding on to things in the first place!  If you don’t hold on to things you don’t have to let go!

What three life issues would you focus on if you were in charge of Benita s life?

Am I crazy or what?  I wouldn’t have those issues!  I’m warm, alive, I jump about! What’s the problem????   I love laughter!  When you laugh I become even bigger!  Laugh!

In what life situations would it be most beneficial for Benita to imagine that she is you and act as you would?

Whenever she wants to hold on to something.  Whenever she laughs it will be difficult for her to hold on!

Character, do you do drama?  If not, why not?

No!  It’s boring and not fun!

What is your secret for staying out of drama?

I am always moving!

Why do you think that you are in Benita’s life?

Because she forgot all about me!  I was smaller and I wasn’t inside her.  I want to be both inside her and to be outside when I want.

How is Benita most likely to ignore what you are saying to her?

Holding on!  Stiffening!  Tightening!

What would you recommend that she do about that?

Let me expand and take up space inside of her!

Benita, what have you heard yourself say?

It was first a little jumping ball that wanted to be closer to me.  It had a jumping aliveness about it.  When it was inside me it expanded, giving me a freedom of warmth and relaxaton.  I suddenly had this feeling that the feeling of tensing up I have has to do with holding on.  This ball has no problem letting go because it doesn’t hold on.  It doesn’t do existential fear; it encourages me that I’m good enough to get jobs and whatever I need.  I don’t need to do fear.  I can allow this ball to expand inside of me so I can let go and relax.

It likes the choice to be inside or outside.  It doesn’t know anything about holding on to things.  It CANNOT hold on to things!

If this experience were a wake-up call from your soul, what do you think it would be saying to you?

Be the ball!  Everything is all right!  Have fun!  Laugh!  Whenever there is laughter it will expand inside me!

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