Are you ever sad? Do you ever feel like those you love the most don’t listen to you or respect you? Are they so into drama they suck you in? What can you do about it? Sharon grew up with a molesting stepfather and a mother that looked the other way and has blamed her for not forgetting about it. This has caused years of depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, and drama. But there are parts of Sharon and you, that were never damaged by childhood injustices. In this interview she meets a very powerful one.
What are three fundamental life issues that you are dealing with now in your life?
Sadness at alienation from mother and family
Which issue brings up the strongest feelings for you?
sadness
If those feelings had a color (or colors), what would it be?
a relaxing green
Imagine that color filling the space in front of you so that it has depth, height, width, and aliveness.
Now watch that color swirl, congeal, and condense into a shape. Don’t make it take a shape, just watch it and say the first thing that you see or that comes to your mind: An animal? Object? Plant? What?
Tree
Now remember how as a child you liked to pretend you were a teacher or a doctor? It’s easy and fun for you to imagine that you are the shape that took form from your color and answer some questions I ask, saying the first thing that comes to your mind. If you wait too long to answer, that’s not the character answering – that’s YOU trying to figure out the right thing to say!
Tree, would you please tell me about yourself and what you are doing?
I’m standing in the middle of a field in the fall. A wheat field with little corn flowers and poppies.
What do you like most about yourself? What are your strengths?
That my leaves always come back! I have deep root and a very thick trunk! I have been around for a while. I’m pretty old! I’m an oak!
What do you dislike most about yourself? Do you have weaknesses? What are they?
No!
Sharon created you, right? What aspect of Sharon do you represent or most closely personify?
The strength that most of the time she is not in contact with at all!
Why is that, Oak?
She is too busy filling her mind with negative things!
Why do you think she does that, Oak?
Maybe she would have to leave the country to get away from all the negative things she is surrounded with.
Oak, is your tree mind filled with negative thoughts?
No! I’m surrounded with beautiful flowers!
Did you have to leave the country for that?
No. I am where I was planted! I don’t know who by! It was a butterfly!
Oak, if you could be anywhere you wanted to be and take any form you desired, would you change? If so, how?
No, I’m deeply rooted here. I feel perfectly fine here!
(Continue, answering as the transformed object, if it chose to change.)
Oak, how would you score yourself 0-10, in each of the following six qualities: confidence, compassion, wisdom, acceptance, inner peace, and witnessing? Why?
Confidence: 10 I don’t do fear! I’m big, I’m strong. I’m deeply rooted! I’m not afraid of anyone coming and cutting me down! Most people would not cut a beautiful old tree even if they built a house.
Compassion: 10 The birds that shit on me don’t hurt me. The rain comes and washes it off.
Wisdom: 10
Acceptance: 10 Dogs peeing on me give me fertilizer!
Inner Peace: 10
Witnessing: 10 I just enjoy the seasons!
How would Sharon’s life be different if she naturally scored like you do in all six of these qualities all the time?
She would have compassion with all these shitty family members. She would be resting in herself. She would have a strong foundation. She would stand up for herself.
If you could live Sharon’s life for her, how would you live it differently?
I would live my life, I would grow, and I would be even wiser. I wouldn’t write letters, I wouldn’t be on the phone, and I wouldn’t do sadness
If you could live Sharon’s waking life for her today, would you handle Sharon’s sadness issue differently? If so, how?
I would just let it out. I would just cry, let it out. If someone cut my trunk I would also cry – my sap would run out.
What three life issues would you focus on if you were in charge of Sharon’s life?
Definitely focus much more on the beauty of nature. That will make all the negative influences less powerful. They will move into the background. She should definitely spend more time surrounding herself with good, healthy people!
In what life situations would it be most beneficial for Sharon to imagine that she is you and act as you would?
But of course! Often! When she feels alone, for instance. If she becomes me at such times she will feel stronger and will not be quite so sad. I don’t keep crying. I close my wound!
Do you think Sharon is capable of closing up her wounds also, Oak?
Yes! She is out of touch with her ability to do this! Go into nature! Become aware of its beauty. Have the confidence that after the crying the closing of the wound comes.
Oak, do you do drama? If not, why not?
No! Don’t need to! It’s not a boring life! Quite the opposite!
What is your secret for staying out of drama?
I stand here in my place, in my field. I enjoy my nature, my environment, my animals, my seasons, being here in Germany.
How would Sharon’s life be different if she dealt with drama the way you do, Oak?
Very stable and peaceful!
How would she have friends? Wouldn’t they all think she was boring?
I have friends! Why wouldn’t she have friends?
Why do you think that you are in Sharon’s life?
I have come to her because it was about time! It’s time for Sharon to reach some stability and get out of that drama triangle!
How would you deal with Sharon’s mother if you were her, Oak tree?
Definitely no contact!
Isn’t that selfish?
No! It’s protective! I would look at her mother with some degree of compassion.
If you were Sharon how would you deal with the drama in her relationship with her boyfriend?
I’d let him live his life, let him be the way he is, and I would feel good within myself.
If Sharon were courageous enough to live her relationship with him like you would, what difference would that make?
Everything would be far more relaxed! Sharon deserves that!
How is Sharon most likely to ignore what you are saying to her?
She won’t! But it would be good if she put up pictures of me!
Sharon, what have you heard yourself say?
I heard the oak say that I ought to spend much more time in nature to refresh and enjoy the water, the plants, the animals. To surround myself with positive energies instead of negative ones. I don’t need the contact with my mother and my family. Without it I can be stable and I can close my wounds without them. Sometimes good people will shit on me but I won’t hold it against them! To get out of the drama triangle. I can leave my boyfriend the way he is. If I do that I will be stable and have inner peace and I’ll be fine.
Do you believe that all this is just a bunch of bullshit fantasy crap that came out of your imagination?
I think it could work.
If this experience were a wake-up call from your soul, what do you think it would be saying to you?
Stop the drama! There’s almost anger about continuing it!